Wednesday, June 12, 2013

LOVE FOR THE MOMENT

ONCE I WAS ASKED BY MY SON, PETER , LIKE A LOT OF CHILDREN MUST HAVE ASKED OTHER PARENTS, WHICH ONE OF US DID I LOVE THE MOST. I THOUGHT ABOUT IT FOR A FEW MOMENTS WANTING TO GIVE A GOOD ANSWER AND AN HONEST ONE.

"WELL, SON, I GUESS IT IS THE ONE THAT IS WITH ME AT THE MOMENT BECAUSE HE NEEDS ME AND WANTS ANSWERS FROM ME; ANSWERS ONLY I CAN GIVE YOU. BUT WHEN I HAVE ANOTHER BROTHER OR SISTER IN FRONT OF ME TALKING AND SHARING; IT IS THAT ONE". HE UNDERSTOOD AND WAS SATISFIED. HE SMILED, KNOWING THAT AT THAT MOMENT I LOVED HIM THE MOST .
HE SCURRIED OUT TO PLAY, SMILING AS HE ALWAYS DID. IT WAS THE BEST ANSWER I COULD GIVE. AND OVER THE YEARS I HAVE FOUND OUT THAT WITH FRIENDS OR LOVERS, THE SAME HOLDS TRUE. WE LOVE THOSE WHO ARE WITH US AT THAT MOMENT; OTHERS CERTAINLY DISAGREE, BUT I DO NOT THINK HUMAN BEINGS ARE CAPABLE OF MORE. IF WE GIVE ONE OUR FULL ATTENTION WE REALLY CAN LOVE FOR THAT PRESENT MOMENT...NOW WHEN A MOTHER , LIKE MYSELF, THAT WAS LUCKY  TO HAVE SIX CHILDREN AND WE GATHER FOR OUR FAMILY OUTINGS, I JUST GLOW; IT CAN BE OVERWHELMING AND I OFTEN GO TO ANOTHER ROOM WHERE I CAN BE ALONE AND I HAVE A SIMPLE PRAYER: "THANK YOU GOD, FOR THIS MOMENT"

Friday, June 7, 2013

The Madonna in My Life

I remember her white nightgown, the typical campo style worn in Mexico, her long flowing black  hair on both sides of her face. I was in awe of this Mexican beauty, my beautiful mother, Alexandria. Everything was white in her room, the light was brilliant almost  as if there were an aura around her. She was lovingly holding a baby. Later I learned he was my brother, little Andrew. She smiled and stroked his his head gently and with the back of her hand she touched his face. It was surreal, magical and confusing.
I felt like an intruder, maybe that was the word, I don't know for sure; I was just a little girl. I thought she looked like a Madonna, holding the Christ child. I remember those images from church. She looked so sad.
It frightened me to see her cry, tears falling down her face and she sobbed quietly and held the baby tight to her chest.  I had never seen mother cry before.I felt frozen;I wanted to help my mother, but I could not. I prayed she would not see me.This was a grown up thing. I did not understand. But I just wanted her to smile again.
 I had witnessed a sacred moment; Andrew died a few days later...